Memoirs of Bellatrix Black
by TimeAndLife21
Summary: Bellatrix was a normal Pureblood like every other one. But Her family as black as their names have dark and twisted lives and secrets that many don't know. The Ancient and Noble House of Black has a bit of a twisted and dark history in the family. But Bellatrix's was the darkest of all. Though she is a Warrior, She has to protect those she loves. Extremely Dark and Mature content.


_**Memoirs of Bellatrix Black**_

By TimeAndLife21

* * *

 _ **Author's Note:**_ I loved how Rowling portrays Bellatrix LeStrange in the Books and how her psyche works. But really, what goes on in that mind of hers? And how did she really end up like she did in the books? This is a bit of a side story that I couldn't really put into _**Black As the Blood In Our Names**_ due to the rather violent, dark, and _**very**_ mature nature of this side story. It Is In the _**BATBION**_ Universe, but this is focused so much on Bellatrix that there isn't really anything I can do to put other Black Family Members into this story. I could do it, but this will be mostly from Bellatrix's POV, respectively speaking, as this does focus on her.

It will not give any major sort ofspoilers away for _**Black as the Blood In Our Names,**_ but will give some hints to what I will be doing for Bellatrix in the Story. Bellatrix is more of a tragic character rather than some sort of villain to be honest, so this will show a very dark and also very human side (However twisted it is) to the Black Family. So these may be seen as drabbles for _**BATBION**_ Bellatrix, mostly because this is what you guys will see of her past… XD So, Take a seat and get ready for A Bellatrix story that I think people have been waiting for.

Also, This fic will have a completely different tone from my other fics. It's Mature Rating is very Dark, very Adult, and it deals with a lot of stuff that I will mention in the warnings down below. If you have seen my profile, It is very old and in need of a dire update. I have grown as a writer and as a person, so I'm not as judgemental as I once was like my younger self. I still have squickish tendencies towards certain types of fics, but because I'm writing one of my own because of my _changed_ outlook on certain topics, This doesn't mean that I support said certain topics. So, with that said, let's move along to the story.

 _ **IMPORTANT WARNING!**_ : I will be touching on sensitive subjects such as: Thoughts of Suicide, Same Sex Attractions and Bisexuality, Murder, Mentions of Non-Consensual Sex, Mentions of Incest, Mentions and some scenes of Abuse (Sexual, Emotional, Physical, and Mental), Self-Harm, Drug and Alcohol Abuse, and possibly more. The Black Family in my mind has always been on the Dark Side of Magic, but they can be even darker people with loose morals and sometimes inhumanity. Keep in mind, though such things will be touched on in _**Black as the Blood in our Names**_ , it doesn't go into descriptive details like this side story. If you don't like the subject that I'm bringing up, you may close out this story and go find another one. You have been warned.

* * *

Bellatrix Black had always enjoyed the color Red. Yes, She loved Greens and Silvers as was her family's way of being in the House of Slytherin at Hogwarts for the Pureblooded and Cunning. She looked damn good in said colors too, but something about the color red just makes her more comfortable. She loved putting the exact shade of red as a rose on her lips. It gave her a more sultry look since she had turned 14 years old. Sometimes she would have red lipstick custom made to be the exact shade of blood. It looked pretty good on her, and sometimes sinister, but that was how things went in the Ancient and Noble House of Black.

Unfortunately, the color red seemed to repulse her as she was in her home throwing up into the toilet as she made sure that she was definitely alone in her parents house. Cygnus and Druella Black had died in a freak charms accident when she was 17, so she was lucky that she was legally an adult, but she was also in charge of her siblings. Grandfather Pollux may be head of the Branch Family of the Blacks, but she was the Legal guardian of Andromeda and Narcissa.

She was lucky that Andromeda had left England to be with extended family in France so she was lucky to not be around for the time being, and Narcissa was at the Malfoys so that she could get to know Lucius a bit more as he courted her. She couldn't bear to have her sisters see her in this weakened state...and especially not around Grandfather Pollux.

She had been on Auror Patrol tonight, called to a home that had a sinister glowing skull and snake hovering over the place, and she had to witness the aftermath of a brutal massacre of a minor PureBlood family, one of the members were...her first and closest girlfriend.

The Fryes family had been Purebloods since the late 18th century and were rather proficient in making ice charms and spells for even the hottest summer days in England. They were more aligned with the Light side of magic, but dabbled in the Dark side when it suits them. She had met the girl at Hogwarts that was part of the Family, Maria Fryes. She was a headstrong woman, a Hufflepuff if you can believe it! But she was rather kind to Bellatrix in their school years, so Bellatrix had a somewhat friend in her, in the beginning. Maria was just as beautiful as Bellatrix. If Bellatrix was the Moon and Stars, then Maria was the sun. She had straw gold hair with equally golden eyes, tanned skin from working under the sun, a button nose and pink rose petal lips and a dimple on her left cheek when she smiled so brightly it hurt. She was all curves and she was the kindest girl in the school, but she wasn't the type to roll over when the going gets tough. Oh no, Maria was a woman who, if you dare to pick a fight with her, her words were "There's a Reason Why Badgers can take down animals more than 10 times their size." She was Loyal to a fault...and Bellatrix admired her for that.

Bellatrix has always had swung for both genders. Going out with a few boys and even some girls was not uncommon in PureBlood Society (Though it was frowned upon by muggles, many Muggleborns and some half-blood standards). She had snogged Icarus Miner (A Halfblood Prefect in Ravenclaw) in her 5th year while he was a 7th, and she had experimented with Katya Yenchovic (A Gryffindor in 6th year when Bellatrix was in her 4th whose Blood was as pure as they came, but rather submissive when it came to their trysts in secret corridors and nooks, Bellatrix had always had a dominant personality), but Maria….

Maria was someone that Bellatrix knew that she had to hide her feelings for. (Yes, the Black family has always been staunchly making sure that they pass on the name to male and female heirs, but that didn't mean that they would hide even the darkest secrets of liking the same genders as they are). Sure, she liked men and women just the same, but Maria was something special. She may be loyal to a fault, she was headstrong like a Gryffindor, and she would defend her fellow puffs in need, but Maria when she was with Bellatrix, Maria was her soft-spoken loving self. Bellatrix could remember the days at Hogwarts when they would study together, walk out to Hogsmeade together, whenever they would find the time, they would be attached to the hip. They had met in 3rd year when Bella took runes and hated having a Gryffindor partner, that Maria would be her partner because she was a bit smarter than some of the puffs that she knew.

Maria was more or less on the spectrum of swinging as well. But the surprise is that they thoroughly enjoyed each others company that they didn't need to have any trysts and the like. There wasn't any need for it. A Bambi couple so to speak. Maria was a cuddler and she would always have her arms around Bellatrix's waist when they would be outside against the trees on the grounds and would cuddle into Bellatrix's side. And Bellatrix with flushed cheeks, would hug back and bury her head into the golden hairs that smelled very much like roses and wine.

Bellatrix's tears and silent sobs broke through after the third time she threw up. Bellatrix really loved Maria. Kind, sweet, and strong Maria who had a passion for her ice charms and wanted to expand on the types of Ice Magic that her family was famed for… The memory was fresh in her mind as she entered the Fryes family home with her group on Aurors…

* * *

She saw the adults, strewn about the floor of the lobby, The cold glazed eyes showed that indeed the killing curse was struck, but as they moved inward closer to their living room, Bellatrix had to call upon her innate will and strength to not buckle her knees, and fall to the ground crying in shock and horror. There was blood everywhere. The floors, the walls the ceilings...it was everywhere. There were children who were cut and slashed to pieces, as few of the teenagers were hanging from the ceiling from hooks like pigs in a slaughter house. Bellatrix was stone cold faced as her fellow aurors were trying to gather their bearings of this massacre.

"Let's...see if there are any survivors...Black...take Faust with you to the upstairs…" The Lead Auror coughed and sighed, he was just as sick as the rest.

Bellatrix was on automatic as she held out her wand and walked down the halls of the upstairs, looking into the rooms to see if there was any evidence that they could find who killed the family (Bellatix's thoughts went to the Knights of Walpurgis… The Bastards) Faust split from her going on ahead as she came to a room that she knew was familiar to her.

She could remember the time she stayed the night here with Maria after accepting an invite to do so, just a few days before the start of their 7th year at Hogwarts. Bellatrix could remember that very night with Maria as they had talked about their time at Hogwarts, what is their future careers and so much more.

 _"Trix, what do you think?" Maria spoke as she took out a rather pretty purple dress and laid it on her front, her voice sounded like bells to her._

 _"Hm?" Bellatrix lifted an eyebrow at the color before she raked her hooded eyes over the girls uncovered body._

 _Currently they were in their thin nightgowns, Maria was wearing a white nightgown to her knees, and Bellatrix was wearing a green one to her thighs._

 _Bellatrix wasn't as curvy as Maria was, but she was thin and athletic. Something that she wanted to keep up with as she wanted to become a hit witch. Sadly, she was lacking in the rack department...barely a B-cup if she was lucky. But she was still quite the beauty. She was a Black after all. But Maria...Bellatrix took notice of Maria's perfectly straight gold hair and wanted to entangle her hands in them. She had a much larger breast size which made her slightly jealous, as they were a C-cup and it was definitely emphasized by the nightgown she wore. Maria wasn't athletic, but she loved dueling._

 _"It's a nice color, it brings out your eyes." Bellatrix smirked._

 _"Well, I'll be wearing it to the next Ball...My Father was hoping that I could meet up with Patrick McKnight again...the last few dates was successful." Maria blushed a bit._

 _Bellatrix was a jealous woman by nature...but she liked to keep things that were hers and hers alone...very rarely would she let it out of her sight and even share them...it extended to people to some extent._

 _She frowned and sighed. She has heard of this Patrick McKnight. A pureblood from across the pond and of rather good stock too. Maria had met up with him a few times and she rather liked the guy. Of course, she still found time for Bellatrix._

 _"Humph. I think you look lovely in anything you wear, Maria. If this man can't see that, then he doesn't deserve you." She smiled animalistically._

 _Maria rolled her eyes and chuckled._

 _"Oh Trix, you look cute when you are jealous." Maria said as she hung up her dress and flounced over to the bed and decided to land on top of the curly haired witch._

 _"Oof! Blacks don't get jealous." Bellatrix said as she rolled onto her back with Maria still on top of her._

 _"Sure you don't." Maria tapped Bellatrix's nose playfully. "Don't think I didn't see you turn red and get possessive, how long have we known each other for?"_

 _Bellatrix rolled her silver-violet eyes before she wrapped her arms around the smaller, curvey, girl to her closely._

 _"Too long now? I get that eventually we get betrothed, but I'll be damned if I become a housewife. I want to travel the world first." Bellatrix smiled._

 _"Send me souvenirs?" Maria blinked up at her._

 _"Anything for you, Bambi." Bellatix spoke fondly._

 _Maria giggled before she snuggled up to Bellatrix and sighed happily._

 _Bella loved the feel of affection and happiness from Maria. It felt so much more warmer than the cooler and darker tones at home. Bellatrix reveled in this kind of affection. Nothing was expected of her, and they didn't have to do anything more than cuddle, kiss, and hug. And that was just fine with her. Bellatrix felt Maria snuggle into her neck and sighed._

 _"Hey Trix, can we still be friends after…" Maria trailed off, tracing randoms designs over the place where Bellatrix's heart was._

 _It was an endearing habit that Maria had. Bellatrix much liked that particular habit as it was a comforting sign that Maria truly trusted her._

 _Bellatrix felt her throat tighten. She would hate to not have her dearest friend though her life. She would rather kill someone if they even tried to take her away._

 _"You are being ridiculous, Maria. Of course we'll still be friends. But let's not dwell on that though any moment longer. Live in the now." Bellatrix smiled as she nuzzled Maria's cheek and gave her a kiss._

 _Maria reciprocated the motion before they let go and snuggled in for the night. For once in her life, Bellatrix relaxed in the arms of her dear one. She had a restful night's sleep as they stayed entwined until the sun rose._

Bellatrix was terrified of what she would see in this room...but she had to do her job. She took a deep breath and opened the door and walked in...only to wish she didn't.

She didn't feel her wand drop from her hand as she saw the horrific scene in-front of her. She swore that her breathing stopped and she could feel tears well up in her eyes and silently going down her cheeks. She took hesitant steps toward the bed that was Maria's, but it was nothing like it once was.

The pale blue sheets were drenched with blood. **_So. Much. Blood._** The pillows were splashed with it and Maria...she was all tied up to the four posts of the bed, naked, and her dulled gold eyes were open with horror and her blue lips were open in a silent scream. Her body was carved and hacked into. Words like 'Blood Traitor', 'Whore', and, other various words that were unsavory were carved into her previously untouched skin. Bruises littered her body and there was a rather prominent thick bruising that looked like hands wrapped around her dainty throat. There were remnants of tears down her face, and her golden hair, the same hair that felt like silk when she ran her hands through it, was spread like a red tinted halo from the blood that soaked into it.

Something in her cracked. Though it didn't show on the outside, she was much too shocked to see… She could feel the sorrow rise up in her, but she didn't moved an inch. She just stared at Maria's body as if it was some sort of...horrific broken doll. She didn't know how long she stood there.

All she could think of was the last time she saw Maria was one week ago...they were at the Jasmine Dragon enjoying each others company and reminiscing of old times. Maria even made Bellatrix, Auror extraordinaire blush a few times, but Bellatrix gave as good as she got. Maria was recently engaged to Patrick McKnight and she wanted her best and dearest friend at the wedding.

 _"You will be my maid of Honor. And the colors for the wedding is red and black." Maria spoke as she wiggles and index find her at Bellatrix._

 _"Oh for Salazar's sake, really?" Bellatrix shook her head laughing._

 _"Yes, really. We go shopping for your dress today. No takebacks. I have a dress in mind too." Maria smiled brightly._

 _It made Bellatrix smile back knowing that her dear friend is in good hands. She had the chance to meet Patrick McKnight. He was a lean man with messy brown hair, but he seemed to be very much in love with Maria. He was a rather shy person, but very open about how she and Maria were in a relationship and didn't care much for what happened in the past. That was a point for him in Bellatrix's book._

 _"Okay, where are we going?" Bellatrix smiled._

 _Twenty minutes later, the two women were in a beauty boutique and Bellatrix was wearing a lovely blood red dress. Long and flowing from the torso with capped sleeves and ruffles from the hips down. She had red strappy heels on and Bellatrix couldn't help but give into her feminine side and twirl in from of the mirror._

 _"Well Trix, I hope you don't show me up at my Wedding. After all, I will be wearing white." Maria chided with a smile._

 _"Well then, you shouldn't have gotten me this dress. I love it." She smiled back as she ran her hands down her side and twirled again._

 _"You always looked good in red Trix, I don't know why you don't wear it often." Maria tilted her head in curiosity._

 _"Red is a Gryffindor Color, Maria." Bellatrix frowned a little._

 _"Not really. I know for a fact that red is a good color for you. It works well with your background. And It brings out a lot of beauty in you too." Maria smiled._

 _"Well… if you say so. I'll wear it." Bellatrix conceaded._

 _"Perfect! I can't wait! We'll both be belles of the ball." Maria laughed._

 _"You'll be married and I'll be fighting off potential suitors. I'll have the most fun." Bellatrix smiled wickedly._

 _"I can't wait to see that." Maria agreed._

 _Maria was stubborn enough that she bought the dress for Bellatrix, and they both gave each other a hug goodbye._

 _"We'll meet up again for my Hen's Party. We'll have more fun there and I'll bring the firewhiskey." Maria spoke as they let each other go._

 _"I'll see you then. Send me the invite." Bellatrix smiled down at her._

 _"I will. Farewell Trix, I'll see you later." She waved and smiled goodbye at her disappearing into the crowd. That was the last time, that Bellatrix had seen her._

"Black, there wasn't any survivors…" She could hear Auror Faust behind her stop, before he walked into the very room that Bellatrix was in.

"Black…" He walked up to her before seeing the body of Maria Fryes. "Oh God…"

Bellatrix didn't move. She was cold on the inside and she spoke with a dead tone.

"Send for the coroner's and their assistants… we have no survivors... " Bella spoke lowly before backing up and turning to leave the room.

Bella could feel the cold, dead, gold eyes of Maria staring at her back. She felt like they were accusing her.

 _Why didn't you come sooner?_

She didn't know that the Massacre was to happen at this very house. She didn't…

It was hours later in front of her boss, Scrimounger was questioning her.

"Did you know anyone in the family?" Scrimounger asked.

Bella was silent for a while. She hadn't spoken at all since she got back from the Fryes Home.

"Auror Black…?" Scrimounger prodded again before he sighed. "I'll give you a leave for two weeks, That should give you plenty of time to mourn."

Bella only nodded slightly before she left the office. It wasn't until she got home that everything for her fell apart. Which lead her to where she was now.

* * *

She threw up in the toilet a couple more times until she didn't think she could do it anymore before her body was wracked by sobs of guilt and sorrow. She didn't think that the Knights of Walpurgis were this brutal. She thought that a political party like them would just be pureblood supporters, but they killed off an entire pureblood family. For what? And Why?

All Bellatrix could think of was Maria in a pool of red blood, with jagged gashes carved into her body, looking at her with dead eyes that she couldn't help but let out a brokenhearted cry. The World saw Bellatrix Black as a woman who couldn't be fazed. She lived for the hunt and enjoyed the catch of the day. Nothing could be done to break her...except this hit much to close to home.

This at the tender age of 19 years old, two years in the Auror Program, she had no clue that her life will change drastically from that night on. And if the Knights of Walpurgis decided to come after her family...well, they better damn well go through her first. She wasn't going down without a fight.

The dark little spark of madness that she knew that the Black Family has, sparked a little brighter. She had to be careful. As exposed as she was in the Branch family of the Blacks, Madness has a tendency to grow in their mind if they let them.

She wiped her mouth with her hand before she stood up to moved her weakened self to the sink, she raised her eyes to see something that she didn't want to see. She saw herself, her hair looked like a rats nest and she looked like an insane asylum escapee. She felt an oily presence in her mind not dissimilar to her Grandfather Pollux's voice.

 _"Such a weak little girl Bellatrix. I wonder if it would be so easy to break you just a little bit more?"_

She bared her teeth and shook her head. Her mind whirled and she slammed her fist onto the counter.

"I'm no weakling. I will not bow, and I will not break. No matter what." She growled fircely.

Maria's Death will be avenged. She just had to find out who killed her...and woe be the man or woman who dare to desecrate her body. Blacks don't bow to adversaries, but they do fight for revenge.

She hated the color red from then on. She stuck with dark colors in her clothes and never went out of her way for the lighter colors since Maria's death. The only color that she would put on her would be her lips. Red as Blood. Some of her co-workers thought that she had turned into a vampire because of it, but really, it was the only shade she could tolerate. She still put on a mask, and that mask that would eventually crack.

She is Bellatrix Black. She is a Warrior. She is a Protector. She is a sister, a niece, and a cousin who would stand in Pollux's way to keep his hands off of her sisters and cousins. She wasn't weak. And the Knights of Walpurgis better be on their toes.

She will have her revenge.

* * *

 _ **TAL21:**_ Yup, I went there. Now I am open to questions and opinions, but yes, Another Part of my headcannon about the Blacks is yes they are human, but even humans have a darker side to them than most would like to admit. This also coincides with In-Breeding in the PureBlood families in the Wizarding world. It has also happened in the real world where Inbreeding in family were common in the dark and medieval ages. Twisted? Yes, but in those ages it was the norm for Royal families to keep their bloodlines pure. Now in the Ages of Polaris and Altair Black (I still need to put up that chapter but damn it's rough draft need working on), They were actually open to letting new blood into their families to have their bloodline grow. But in the modern time, during the days of Riddle's self championing himself to be the savior of the PureBloods, the Blacks are already well known about incest marriages with cousins and even distant cousins at this part of time, it was to keep their blood 'Always Pure', in many aspects. _**  
**_

I would suspect the the madness in the Black family would be more on the magical side of things rather than actually mental. this type of magical Madness can grow and eventually overtake minds. At least that's how I put it into perspective, lets see how i can twist it to the point of Bellatrix's current state of mind.

So I hope you enjoyed this twisted and darker side story for Bellatrix, there will be more of her, Andromeda, Narcissa, Sirius and Regulus, with also appearances of Cassiopeia, Pollux, Arcturus, Orion, Walburga, and various unnamed Black relatives that I will have fun writing about. :) Please leave detailed reviews and opinions as they will help me flesh out the story a lot more if you do so. See you guys in the next chapter!

 _ **Question Time!:**_ As this story will be very mature and dark, what themes and certain aspects would you want to to tackle and take on, or even any at all?

 _ **Keep on Reading and Writing!**_


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